Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Christmas and red thong undies!

Well tis the season to be jolly! What the h*ck is this jolly thing any way? I mean when I think of jolly I get this mental picture of a fat guy laughing all with three of his chins jiggling in sync.

As I sit here and write this entry I am taking in the new sounds of Christmas; my son is playing Rock Band on his new x box 360. Rock Band is this X Box game where you play guitar, drum and voice simulators to old rock tunes and you get scored on how well you hit the notes that scroll on the screen. If you s#ck bad enough you get kicked off the stage. If that's not an esteem builder. Anyway my son is having fun and enjoying himself (along with his siblings, cousins' and all the adults in the family); isn't that what we are supposed to do with our Christmas gifts anyway.

Get this, we are all sitting around my in laws great room last night after the traditional reading of the Christmas story. With all the candles burning, Mom opens up the floor to discuss any significant meaning that the Christmas story may have to each one of us. My niece shared this very spiritual story; it was neat to see her open up and let others know about her relationship with Jesus. Well my son decides to share a significant story; so I think. He then begins to share with the entire family of how he went into my underwear drawer and took a pair of my string bikini underwear and put them on and ran around the outside of the house after I dared him to do so when we lived in Springfield, Missouri. Of course I was NOT embarrassed, but I wondered how all that tied into the Christmas story? Well if figured in the mind of a 12 year old boy he must have related his wearing my underwear as a spiritual experience. Somewhere, in 12 year old male logic, this holds spiritual significance.

So I get up the next morning and I open up a gift from my friend John; HOLY UNDIES! He gives me a red silk thong as a gift (I think it was a gag?). The moment I opened that gift I had an epiphany; somehow underwear hold spiritual significance. I have to WUDJW (What Underwear Did Jesus Wear) this one. I know my Mormon buddy wears that one piece deal and he seems content (Hey, he is always smiling! Hey come to think of it, Borat wore one too!).

So with all this underwear talk behind us, let me stop on the religious undies kick and get on to what I really want to say; Merry Christmas to all my family and dear friends.


Steph said...

Now THAT is a Christmas story!! Rich, you crack me up. Roxie, you might want to clarify that the post is by Rich and not you!! FYI, the underwear isn't one piece! :)

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