Last Friday morning I was helping her get ready for school. I brushed her hair and asked if she wanted to wear a hair bow in her hair, she said no. I moved on to brush her sisters hair, asked her sister if she wanted a hair bow, she said yes. Well then the little one decides she wants a hair bow too. So I send them both to the bathroom to pick out hair bows. Now, on Fridays they wear their school spirit shirts which are red with royal blue writing on them. The little one comes back with 2 barrettes, a brown one and a purple one. So I tell her that she can't wear those because not only do they not match each other but they don't match what she is wearing. She proceeds to tell me..."But, I want to." So I tell her she can wear the brown one but not the purple. Then she sees laying in her room some old hair clips that I used to use but now I let them play with them. One is red and one is light blue. See Pic...
So she decides she wants to wear them in her hair. I again tell her no and she starts arguing with me. It is now time to leave so I walk out of the room and tell her father to please take care of it because she listens to him better than she listens to me. So he calls for her, it takes her awhile to come, but she does come out with nothing in her hair, then he just tells her to listen to her mother. I take them all to school.
When I go to pick my little one up after school she has the 2 barrettes in her hair, the brown one and the purple one. So I asked her where they came from. She says, "someone at school gave them to me." I tell her "no they didn't, you had those at home this morning, did you stick them in your pocket and put them on after you got to school?" Reply..."no." Me..."yes you did. Don't lie about it." No answer.
Unfortunately looking back on it I really dropped the ball on the parenting with this one. First of all, I should've let her wear whatever she wanted in her hair, so what if it didn't match, no big deal. Secondly, after the deception I didn't really do anything about it other than tell her not to lie. There were no consequences for her behavior at all, I just let it go. I guess I was feeling guilty about making such a big deal about the hair bows in the first place.
However, I have never in my life heard of a 4-year-old that has this thought process...mom won't let me wear them, I'll just stick 'em in my pocket and put 'em on when I get to school! What 4-year-old thinks like this besides mine? I flashed forward a few years, probably around 5 or 6 years from now, and imagined her sneaking make-up to school and putting it on there. Anyway, I just thought I'd share my struggles in parenting. Am I the only one who has this problem?